Sure, some of them are semi-original: grabbing the toast that pops up from the toaster was definitely different, even if it was just to see who would push A the fastest. I appreciate that the time and ideas that should have gone into better game design or getting a single voice clip somewhere in here was passed over in trying to find which games from Mario Party they could properly rip off without getting sued. The core of Garfield Lasagna Party are the minigames, and, sweet pasta Jesus, there’s a lot of them. If this happened at McDonalds, I’d finally be shamed into eating better. Maybe don’t be trash at the game next time! You can clutch your oversized skull and stare at the ground, but you’re still constantly smiling because you have no soul, so I don’t really buy your sorrow at being in last, Odie. It’s almost like watching mascots at a cheap theme park try to act out a scene with their goddamn blank slate heads. Instead, it’s just the same character sprites, gesticulating and moving with no emotion or thought behind them. If it was some kind of cutscene, I might almost forgive the developers for wanting to really show off the sick Garfield animation they put together. These little moments are stretched out and bloated through sluggish, boring animations that aren’t even separate from the game. After each minigame, you find out who’s in the lead. Before each round, you find out who’s in the lead. When it’s someone’s turn, you have a dedicated amount of time where the players can decide if they want to use an item or not. When an item is used, a massive banner covers the screen to tell you what it does, even if you’ve seen it twenty times before. I have mastered warmed bread! GENUFLECT, PEONS!įor a game with no character special moves or variant in the board, you’d think things would go quickly, but Garfield Lasagna Party takes an EXORBITANT amount of time to explain and re-explain everything. Or at least, it would be really fast, if the game wasn’t insistent on thinking you had the memory span of a Post-It. If you happen to land on a lucky spot with a super dice, you then can roll up to ten spots in a single turn, which is a huge mover and can make things go really fast. There’s a countermeasure to each of these items: a hot dog adds a bunch of moves to your roll to improve movement, and the hamburger prevents your roll from being messed with at all. But if you get an eraser, for example, you can remove the effect of a space an opponent lands on, effectively making their turn for naught. Some, like the banana peel, are pretty incidental: for the price of two coins, you eliminate one space from an opponent’s roll. If you get coins, pick up items that can seriously affect the game in different ways. The very best of “dig up a patch of dirt and open that gate when it shuts.” A complex marvel.Īs far as the board game strategy of it goes, Garfield Lasagna Party is fairly simple: roll as much as you can as often as you can. You have one board, there’s a bunch of random spaces (some with lasagna!) and that’s pretty much it. Sorry, I didn’t even know Jon had a backyard: I was just marveling that he had a house with a big enough crawl space to hide all the bodies of runaways he’s collected throughout the decades. You get one board, which I guess is set in Garfield’s backyard, the quintessential place you think of when you think of Garfield. In theory, this should mean that attention to detail that should have gone to the characters instead goes to the board, but that’s also a hopeless opium dream that I chase like the ghost of my dead Victorian wife (I miss you, Lady Arestra Villanesto). Want to play as Jon, the veterinarian, or some kind of Garfield variant? Too bad, you get those four and that’s all! You can choose from Garfield, Odie, Nermal, or Arlene, whose name I had to look up three times because I kept forgetting it. Many people don’t think of the expanded Garfield universe when it comes to characters, and neither did the developers of Garfield Lasagna Party. This dog will take two of your spaces and otherwise not affect the game at all.
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